<rant> Yesterday (Sunday) I had an audition for a national wind orchestra which i've been in for several years playing clarinet. I led last year and having got as far as you can rank-wise on clarinet I thought I'd audition on flute you know, just for kicks, to sit at the back of section and have a really good time with my friends and get some good fluting experience. So I played, rather well considering I havnt had a lesosn in 2 years, and they said yes very nice, who'd have thought it, blah blah blah. And then asked me to me come back to the Eb (thats the little baby clarinet ) post. Which is fine, I do love playing Eb, I've done it before with them but I'm no way bored of it yet and I figured maybe they had had a lot of good flautists who hadnt had the chance to play in the orchestra yet coming through and lots of very good reasons for keeping me on clarinet. But no. No, the reason they don't want me to play flute is becasue I should be focusing on clarinet. First problem: I don't study clarinet anymore. It's like they've had a life plan for me since they met me 5 years ago. Apparently they were really amazed in my first audition (shows how few really good players they've heard - I played awful!) and it would seem that they have adopted me as their pet famous-soloist-to-be ever since. Nuuuuu! Flatterin as that is, I don't want to be pushed into that, and they couldn't even I wanted. They have ideas well above their station... They also told me that several things were holding me back - 1. my boyfriend. They basically told me to dump him. No good reason, just do it. 2. my recent inhibition has apparently made me play quieter. My friend was killed in front of my eyes in 2004. Since then I've been a little timid and it has come through, unfortunaltey in my playing - jesus, sorry if the counselling hasn't fully recovered me yet... 3. Disney. Yep, they didn't even know I was applying to go to Florida but when I mentioned I may not be able to do the sumemr course and why, they thought it was the most hilarious thing they had ever heard and told me not to in a tone of voice that just assumed I would do as they say without question. I said to them that there are an awful lot of people who this means an awful lot too. Apparenly I'm being silly and lying. 4. Recorder. I'm at music college, my principal study is recorder. The director of this orchesra went to the same colleg i go to and hated it and thinks I'm stupid als for going their. I am especially stupid, apparently, for doing recorder. I am EXTREMELY stupid for trying out things like viola da gamba, baroque oboe, flute, bassoon etc AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH </rant> has anyone else had this sort of problem, people trying to control your life, saying the things you want to do are silly? Es[ecially with Disney, maybe you've had some blocks from people telling you to stop beeing so silly and do somehting more normal? rah. grrrrrrrrrr PHA Sorry for such a long post and congrats for reaching the end if you havnt skipped through to here already! I'd be glad of any helpful comments, sympathising lol Beth xx Oooo btw, my parents booked go to go WDW at christmas! We fly christmas day and return new years day lol (cheap[er] flights )
hey well i cant help musically, cause i sound like a dead cat, but anyone who tells you to change your life like that is harsh, specially telling you to not do disney! if you cant do that now whe can you?!? and im also going to wdw from the 27th of dec to the 4th of jan to start the new year disney style
I haven't had any problems like this, thankfully, all my family and friends and even my boss are rooting for me. My 2 cents on the matter are that your Orchestra heads ( or whatever thay are called) have become to reliant on you and believe you'll follow whatever they say. If it where me I'd make an appointment or whatever to speak with them and let them know that their opinions etc were very hurtful to me personally and that though I'm thankful for their advice it came across as biased and that I feel I have gone as far as I can go on clarinet and that they are holding me back from MY goals, not theirs. This is my life and my choices and I won't have people judge me for them or hold me back from what I want to achieve just in order to let them have a easy go of it, shake it up a little. ANy hoo I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you in the end.
